I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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