I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize
