He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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