This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
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Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
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It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Randomize