I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
