Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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