yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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