We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I looked at my own cervix.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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