Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She bit a glass in half.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
