I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I'm lost and stupid without you.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
