so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
