no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
