ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
she pinky promised me she was 18
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
please don't ironically join a cult
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