you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
