i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize