we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
you win again, gameday.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize
