I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....