just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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