Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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