in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
