You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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