I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
