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Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
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