Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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