Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
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We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
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You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend