Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize