sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
