Non-Jews are for practice
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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