Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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