Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
