Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I still have a little drunk in my system
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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