WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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