What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
