We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize