I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
