i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize