Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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