I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
