Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
