in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize