doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
