You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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