just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Couch. On fire.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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