do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
