guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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