Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
