shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
