peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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