So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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