I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
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I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize